Hiatus

hi⋅a⋅tus

–noun, plural -tus⋅es, -tus.
1.a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.

I'm on hiatus.  I've pulled myself away from the internet, though I'm not sure for how long.  Initially I'd thought a week would be long enough get my thoughts together, fix my editorial issues, ect.  But here I am a week later, and I don't feel a whole lot better off than I was seven days ago.

Last week started off great.  On Monday I took all of the wonderful advice my blogging friends gave me to heart, and sat down with Hallie, my main character.  The two of us had a nice, long talk, and she told me how she felt, what she saw, the things that went through her mind.  I discovered a new way to open ILYU, and though it may not work in the long run, I'm quite satisfied for the time being.  

I was able to get quite a bit accomplished until Wednesday night, and really feel as though I've got Hallie's voice the way I want it.  (That and the new beginning are the two main accomplishments I am proud of.)  But then, after spending endless hours cutting, pasting, deleting, typing, re-typing, and doing exactly what that quote says, something along the lines of "This morning I took out a comma, and tonight I put it back" (I know the quote, I've tweeted it, but I don't have time to look it up right now), my mind went on hiatus too.  No matter how hard I tried on Thursday or Friday, my thinker was done, worn out, finished.  I was very disappointed in myself, to say the least. Even yesterday afternoon, after finishing a book that wasn't at all how I thought it would be, I figured, "Hey, perfect. Lesson learned - don't do that with your WiP." but when I sat down to work, the screen felt like one of those hypnotizing swirling things going round and round while someone said "You are getting sleepy..." and I couldn't focus.

So anyway, to get to the point...  Staying away from my favorite sites, twitter, blogger and facebook, mainly, taught me one thing.  Actually, I take that back, it taught me two things.  The first thing I learned (or was reminded of, actually - this wasn't really a surprise to me at all) was that my time management sucks.  I realize I'm not the first one to say this, but the whole writing/platform thing is very time consuming.  I keep having to remind myself that though a platform is necessary, it's no use if there's nothing to platform.  Which means that the WiP is numero uno, and the platform thing comes after that.  Wayyyyyy after that.  Like my dessert to reward myself for getting everything else done first.

The second thing I learned was that I miss being on those sites, talking with people, seeing what is going on with everyone.  You all mean more to me than you will ever know - this internetal (yes, just made that up) tie to other writers out there is the lifeline that keeps me going day after day.  (I would say I miss my Bejeweled, but that would be lying, because the one thing I did allow myself to do every night, after the kids had been fed and my eyes burned so bad that I wanted to gouge them out of the sockets, and brain was so mushy I could barely form whole sentences, much less get them to leave my mouth, was a few games of Bejeweled.  It didn't require words, or commas, or thoughts, really.  I used it as my wind-down, my way to relax after trying to think all day long.  Oh and not that I'm bragging or anything, but I do have a pretty decent score. Hee hee.)  I want to thank you all for your advice, not only as comments on my blog, but as posts on your own sites, blogs, twitter, ect.  Like many readers I don't always have the time to acknowledge your posts, but they mean more than you'll ever know. 

So I'm still on hiatus.  This week is going to be crazy anyway, between the kid's birthday tomorrow and Valentine's Day and everything else.  But next week I'm going to resurface, slowly, and with purpose, and hopefully come back with much work accomplished and lots of great quips and advice to tweet again.

3 comments:

Tiana Smith said...

Oh my goodness, I know EXACTLY how you feel. Sometimes it is so time consuming, and I wonder how on earth I'm going to manage everything. I think you definitely need a plan of attack. Otherwise, you run out of time and wonder how it all happened. I'm planning on taking a break some time here in the new future. Kudos to you for taking initiative, and good luck!

DL Hammons said...

Jessica,
You need to do whats right for you and your work. I believe that every single one of us understand being pulled in many different directions and the affect it has on focus. This community has its own ebb and flow, with some writers having more time to spend here and others limited because of their WIP (and other factors). Over time roles reverse.

I admire you for pushing away from the table and taking the time you need to re-vitalize. And when you return...we'll warm ourselves in the glow of your renewed enthusiasm.

Elisabeth Black said...

I look forward to seeing you again on twitter. Rock the hiatus, girl.